Footprints In The Sand

One night a man had a dream.
He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Scenes from his life flashed across the skyand he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,

one belonging to him and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene of his life had flashed before him, he recalled that at the lowest and saddest times of his lifethere was only one set of footprints.
Dismayed, he asked, "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. I don't understand why, when I needed you most, you would leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious child. I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering when you saw only one set of footprints...
That was when I carried you."

Carolyn Joyce Carty ©

In My Dreams...

Last night I had several, horrible nightmares one after another. I think it was my fear that was feeding into my imagination, and I didn't sleep very well making it not possible to go into a really deep sleep. I had one dream last night that scared me at first but, comforted me after I has thought about the deeper meaning I found in it, and that was the last dream I had before waking. Yes, I happen to believe you can receive messages through dreams. Anyways, here is my dream, and you can decide!



Dan and I were driving on an isolated dessert road, that was out in the middle of nowhere, and I'm not for sure if Marissa was with us.. I don't remember seeing her. It was night with a warm breeze in the air. We came up to a car accident, where the lady who was injured was being loaded into an ambulance, I don't remember seeing her face, but the highway patrol officer told us we had to turn around, because the road was blocked. I have no idea where we were taking a drive too, but we turned around. As we were driving in the opposite direction, I saw a lady walking on the sand in the reflection of the siren lights, and I knew in my heart it was the lady that was in the car accident that was sitting on the gurney. I remember telling Dan to look at her, but he couldn't see her. As I looked at her I was being pulled toward her. The first thing I noticed about her was that she was wearing a long flowing dress, she had long brown flowing curly hair. At this point, I couldn't see her face still because I was behind her still being pulled to her, I remember looking down into the sand and seeing a single foot print, that was bloody, I was confused why there was only one footprint, and really confused why it was bloody. I realized that it was the foot print of the lady that was walking in front of me, but I noticed she had two legs.. I remember feeling at this point everything the lady was feeling.. the hair flowing in the warm air, feeling light as a feather, free, and I felt the most calming feeling I have ever felt in my in tire life! I then felt like I was being pulled away from her, and as I was I continued to look at her, and she turned her head, and to my surprise it was me....



The feeling that I felt in, and from this dream I had twice in my life. One was after my car accident twelve years ago, and I honestly thought I had an out of body experience, it was the same place except I was over palm trees. The second dream took place about five years ago when I was praying that I would find God in my heart, the dream was the same "feeling" but, it took place on a beach, near a light house in a grassy field with flowers. There was a women with two little girls looking at me, and to this day I know I saw Jesus standing there too.. It was a very moving dream, and made me cry when I awoke because I believed I had my prayer answered! In every dream it felt like I was truly there, and was being sent a message! The last dream made me think of the poem "Foot Prints In The Sand" and the message that I received from the dream is that God with always be there with me, know matter the outcome, of a car accident, surgery or when I'm praying...

My Surgery...

My surgery was this morning at nine a.m, it was right on schedule and went well! The only down fall to the whole procedure is that once the Doctor got into my knee and looked at it, he discovered that when I walk my joints were rubbling together, with no cushion. that would explain some of the pain I was having... Geez! I just can't believe that it didn't show up on the x-ray, or M.R.I?? Anyways, he drilled holes in my bone to make it bleed, so I could make scar tissue to protect my knee, and have a cusion as a walk?? So, the Doctor is producing something in my knee that is the very thing that was making me in pain in the first place... humm? I guess they do this with athlete's all the time and they are up and going after six weeks. He also cleaned out the meniscus tear, and cleaned out some of the imflimation, and gave me a steroid shot. So, I was only originally supose to be on crutches for two days. Now, I will be on crutches for six weeks with no wieght on my leg at all... I'm not looking forward to the next six weeks, but I'm very hopeful it will help my pain, and it will go very fast! Tomorrow will be four weeks that I injured myself, and that has gone by super fast!!
Anyways, I was able to come home only twenty minutes after I woke up. I handled the medications very well! Which never seems to be the case!! I was able to come home and sleep it off in my own bed, and tonight I feel fantastic! A little sore, a liitle sleepy, but very THANKFUL!!!
I'm very thanful for all the thoughts, phone calls, prayers, comment wishes, messages, flowers, text messages, and help with my family! I'm truly blessed to have such wonderful friends and family....

Today and Tomorrow...

My arthroscopic surgery is in the morning at, 9:00 a.m. I have a meniscus tear that the Doctor will be fixing, and he will be cleaning my knee up. I'm so nervous about it! My tummy is a mess!

To get my mind of of it we went and watched the new Indiana Jones movie, and went for a ride up Lamoille Canyon, and we ended up going to dinner at The Pine Lodge, in Lamoille. It was so good! We brought some peach cobbler home for desert and I just ate some ...hummm!! The drive was so peaceful! The snow is still very deep in some areas! We pulled of on the side of the rode, and took some pictures next to the snow, and in some spots the snow was as tall as me... Crazy!! It was a very peaceful trip, and it certainly got my mind of of things....

I can't wait to go camping up there this summer, and to use our new camper.. it's so exciting!!

My Boss Gave This Quote To Me...

"I expect to pass through this life but once.

Therefore, if there is any kindness I can show,

or any good thing I can do for another human being,

let me do it now, for I shall not pass this way again."

(William Penn)

May is Arthritis Awareness Month

The Arthritis Foundation is the only national not-for-profit organization that supports the more than 100 types of arthritis and related conditions. The Arthritis Foundation is the largest private, not-for-profit contributor to arthritis research in the world, funding more than $380 million in research grants since 1948. Celebrating its 60th anniversary this year, the foundation helps people take control of arthritis by providing public health education; pursuing public policy and legislation; and conducting evidence-based programs to improve the quality of life for those living with arthritis. Learn more facts about arthritis and the Arthritis Foundation.

What Marissa Does When She's Bored...

Marissa is very famous for taking my cell phone, and putting random pictures on it, even though she has her own camera, and her own cell phone. She just loves to put "little somethings" on my phone! Crazy little girl! I do love her! Even though it makes me crazy, it puts a smile on my face when I see her "sweet nothings"! These three pictures are probably three out of forty that I have found in just the last couple of days....

Alot Can Happen In One Day...

Today, I went to the Doctor's and got the results of my M.R.I. The Doctor told me that I indeed have a meniscus tear and needs to be surgically dealt with. It was what I didn't want to hear, and I truly was hoping for a better outcome! Needless to say, I cried as I left the Doctor's office, and as I sit here I have dropped a tear or two! I've honestly dealt with enough Doctor's already in my life to last me a lifetime! I don't want to have this done, and I just really would like it to all go away! The Doctor said a had a very unique case, because of the extreme trauma that I dealt with in the past. He once again told me that I needed a knee replacement, but if I started doing knee replacements now.. I would more than likely be in a wheel chair when I'm sixty! Sixty years old id still extremely young! So, what a predicament I find myself in! Do I wait for a knee replacement and have no quality of life or, do I get a knew replacement and live a quality of life now, and possibly be in a wheel chair at sixty?? I know my situation could be alot worse, and I'm truly thankful it's not! I'm just going to pray for the best!

Today, was our thirteenth anniversary! Wow, what a trip! It was extremely cold today dropping in temperature from the high eighties to the mid fifties.... It was cold! It rained though, and I'm a sucker when it comes to the rain... How romantic! We went out to eat with my parents.. not so romantic! But, we already celebrated our anniversary this past weekend, so it was nice spending time with them! Besides, thirteen years ago, they are who we spent the day with in celebration! Who would of imagined, that life would have taken use where it has! It's simply amazing...

It was also my last day of work today. We had our end of the year program, and barbecue. It turned out wonderful, in spite of the weather! It was so hard to say goodbye to my little preschoolers.. They each have a special place in my heart!!

Beautiful...

On our way home tonight I couldn't resit taking some pictures of the clouds, they were so low and pretty!

One Of My Favorites...

Love is strong yet delicate.

It can be broken.

To truly love is to understand this.

To be in love is to respect this.

- Stephen Packer -

A Memory To Last A Life Time....

My little moment in time tonight will be a memory I will never forget! We took our boat out on the water tonight, and I told myself I was leaving all the worrying and stresses of my life at the doorsteps of my house, and I told myself I was going to go out on that water with my family to enjoy my special time, with no one else knocking at my head to get in and worry or stress about them. Well, we went out on the water and we had the most peaceful time, together... This was a good reminder to me, that I need to worry less about everyone else, and myself, and focus more on the important things in life...

When we were out on the water it was already so perfect, and Dan gave me a little white box at sunset. I smiled at him and asked him what it was... He smiled back, and I opened it, and it was a new diamond ring! I gasp... and started to cry! It was already so perfect, and he made it all that more memorable! Dan bought me a new diamond ring to celebrate our thirteenth anniversary, that's not official until, May 21. I feel like we have been celebrating it for three days now... It doesn't get any more romantic than that!! As we were cruising back to the docks, Marissa kept smiling at me, and I would smile at her, and she finally said.. This must be the happiest boat ever! She got that right! It was! It wasn't about the material things, it was the bonding things... We had originally named our boat "the Drifters" and I think that it needs to be named "The Happy Boat".....

Our Anniversary...

This weekend Dan and I went to Salt Lake City to stay at the Anniversary Inn, to celebrate our thirteenth anniversary...gasp! It was a fantastic night, and I would recommend the Anniversary Inn to anyone who wants to get away for the night, or to celebrate a special occasion! This was the sixth time going there, and we love it dearly! If your interested here's the website.... http://www.anniversaryinn.com/ The Anniversary Inn has two locations in the Salt Lake City area and one location in the Boise area.

Let the Feeling Last...

Okay, for the first time in thirteen days I feel great, finally! I'm so excited for this weekend! Dan and I are going out of town to celebrate our thirteenth anniversary...Sigh! Our anniversary is on the 21st, but that's my last day of work and I need to be there for our end of the year program... Besides, I have worked so hard to put it together, I want to see the finished product, plus I need a closure to the end... It truly is bitter sweet!

I haven't heard anything back on my M.R.I yet, hopefully tomorrow! It will be interesting to see how I am able to get around when we go out of town... I'm a little worried about it, but totally open to getting out of town!

I applied to TMC today to take online courses through the summer. I'm on a mission to get my degree! I want to graduate next spring, and with a little extra drive, I know I can accomplish it!

In A Blink Of An Eye...

My husband is a underground gold miner and works for the company, SMD on Barricks property. Yesterday, they lost there contract because of the fatalities that has happened in the last couple of months.. There's been three that SMD has had on different properties and the companys lost alot of money over it, which is totally understandable but, they put the screw to everyone else, and a hundred and fifty men lost there jobs, and were layed off in a blink of an eye!! Crazy!! SMD has not had a single fatality in thirty years.. I don't know what, or who's responsible for the change? Dan got picked up at Newmont already, which is the last company he worked for. They hired him on as a salery foremen, two hundred hrs. of vacation, comp. days, insurance from the hire date, and a sign on bonus. So, everything is going to be okay. He had an offical interview this morning to settle everything and to sign on. I hope that the others will find there way too! It's not very fun when something like this happens! We were really worried about the insurance because of my knee problems. I don't ever need to worry about Dan getting a job around here, he's a very respected miner who can go anywhere he wants, I was just worried about the insurance, because most company's make you wait your ninty days! I'm so glad it worked out in our favor! Besides, Dan needs to take the job for his health! He really has been working his butt off for the money he has earned the last couple of years.. it will be a nice change of pace for him, and will allow him to get off his foot...

It's wierd how things don't work out, and it's amazing when they do.... Today, I'm so very thankful!

Mother's Day and Today

I had a wonderful Mother's Day! We went out to brunch with my family, and then just spent the rest of the day relaxing at home. My knee was feeling better, so that made the day alot brighter just in itself! Marissa made me a fan at school, and wrote a poem of why I am special, it was so cute! Dan and Marissa also got me the movie Twenty Seven Dresses, a beautiful hanging flower basket, and a Sorrelli necklace.

I went back to work today, and getting there and being there was "work" just by itself! It was good to see all the kids in my class.. I missed them so much! They made me some cute get well cards.. I loved them! We only have three more classes left. It's crazy!

Marissa got her hair cut yesterday also.. I couldn't stand it any more and cut it myself. It's above her shoulders and looks alot better than it did! It will be easier for her to take care of too...

Tonight I feel like I'm getting the flu? I don't know what's up with that!

Whe It Rains It Pours...

Someone stepped on my computer screen today, I won't mention any names, but it looks like I will be getting a new computer very soon! The screen is cracked and it looks like the color is slowly spreading... I spent most of my afternoon downloading all my stuff to my jump drive, and printing off everything I need for work. When it rains it pours, right?

Last night I could not get my knee to settle down it hurt so bad! I was in excruciating pain! I couldn't even put any pressure on it, including my cotton carpi's over the top of it, or my blanket! I thought I was going to have to go to the E.R! I think I might have injured it even more yesterday! So, today my couch has been my best friend!

My sisters girls are staying the weekend with us, and they have been a huge help! It's been nice because Dan is on night shifts, so it definitely helps having them here! Besides, they were outside almost all day! So, it keep Marissa entertained too...

I've also decided that I'm making a different Doctors appointment on Monday, and we will see what happens!

Things happen in three, right? I think I totally past my three! Can't things get brighter!!

My Lunch Today...

Today, I ate a low fat lunchable for lunch, and I thought it was so interesting when I was almost done, that I noticed I had one extra piece of ham in there.. I thought, Wow! That never happens! My point? ....You never get anything for free in this life! Anyways, I didn't eat it! I didn't have a cracker, and piece of cheese go go with it, interesting! Maybe a little to much time on my hands, You be the judge!

Some Helpful Advice....

Okay, I just got the best advice, (as I'm up late again with just my late night thoughts)... from a complete stranger! I thought it was very kind of him to take the time to pass on some very useful websites filled with helpful information on knee health. So, if you are having knee problems, or problems, with your back, diabetes, fibroids, heart, Reflex, or veins, I would highly recommend this site! So, go check it out! Just click on the link here.. http://www.knee1.com/
Here's another site that you might be interested in http://www.cartilagerestoration.org/, this site has some useful information on it also!

The best advice that I received through this comment is, don't settle for one Doctor's opinion, it is my knee after all, right? I'm also going to check into physical therapy! I get the feeling I should have been doing that along time ago...

Thanks for the useful info.... I think I'm going to get some rest after all!

Reality Setting In...

Okay, yesterday I went to the Doctor's office to see what was going on with my knee, and he told me it looks like I tore my meniscus muscle, which is located between the joints of your knee, and leg bones. The Doctor took some x-rays, and the x-rays showed a distinct white area where the meniscus is located, and that is not good, a healthy fully attached meniscus is black on an x-ray. So, next week I will have an M.R.I to see how bad the tear is, and if I need surgery to clean the area out and fix it, and if it's a small tear it will heal on it's own, that's what I'm hoping for!

Yesterday, I was so relieved to just know what was going on, and today the seriousness has kicked into high gear! I'm so freaked out that I will need surgery, it is keeping me restless at night, and when I finally do fall asleep, I keep having nightmares of surgery gone wrong! I guess that's something everyone experiences when faced with surgery, right? If anything, I'm pretty sure that I don't want to stay here, in Elko to have any medical procedure done! I've had to many medical nightmares to last me, and my family a life time!

When something like this tests you, and your family, it truly weeds out your "true" friends from the rest of your friends. You might find a friend in the least expecting place, and might be suprised by the very friend that you thought would always be by your side. I'm so thankful to all my "true" friends, and my family, they truly have been so kind and caring! I wouldn't expect anything less from them though... they truly are amazing!

The 411 On My Knee...

Okay, so I went to a retirement party for my boss at the Star (which is the BEST place in Elko to eat!) on Friday night, and after wards went to a couple of clubs. Anyways, we had a great time, until I had a couple of drinks in me, and I decided to run across the street to get a friend, that was going home, I didn't want her to walk by herself! Anyways, everyone knows I've been having some serious knee problems lately, and knows that I should NOT be running on my knee right now! Well, to make a long story short, while I was running my knee snapped, and I have not been able to walk on it since... I'm waiting to go to the Doctors in the morning, I hope he has something good to tell me, but I won't hold my breath! I'll let yea know what happens....

Marissa has been so sweet! Every time I get up she wants to come help me, she told me earlier, "Mom, it's okay! You can put your weight on me, I will be your crutch!" I thought it was so cute!

Don't live for regret...

Regret is an intelligent (and/or emotiona) dislike for personal past acts and behaviors. Regret is often felt when someone feels sadness, shame, embarrassment or guilt after committing an action or actions that the person later wishes that he or she had not done. Regret is distinct from guilt, which is a deeply emotional form of regret — one which may be difficult to comprehend in an objective or conceptual way. In this regard, the concept of regret is subordinate to guilt in terms of its "emotional power." By comparison, shame typically refers to the social (rather than personal) aspect of guilt or (in minor context) regret as imposed by the society or culture (enforcement of ethics, morality), which has substantial bearing in matters of (personal and social) honor.

Regret can describe not only the dislike for an action that has been committed, but also, importantly, regret of inaction. Many people find themselves wishing that they had done something in a past situation, or had not done something for that matter. Don't live your life in regret.. if you have one thought of regret, you have alreay lived one too many days with regret! Do it, mean it, and forget about it...

I regret nothing. Neither the good done to me, nor the bad; to me, they’re all the same.
It’s all paid for, swept away, forgotten; I don’t care about the past. With my memories,

I’ve lit a fire. My sorrows, my pleasures, I need them no more. Swept away are my loves,

and all their tremors. Swept away forever. I start from scratch. I regret nothing.

Because my life, because my joys, today, begins with me....

I am me... because I regret nothing!

Me, Sitting On My Little Soap Box, Pondering...

As I sit back and study mankind, his thinking, reasoning, and behavior; I am forced to wonder how he can be so far advanced in technology and industrialization, yet so retarded in societal understanding!